New & Old

The nature of an obligation needs to be examined. I lived my life holding onto either one sided or sub par relationships and situations out of obligation until recently. I rationalized this behavior with loyalty and longevity. I'd been committed to friendships/circumstances for x amount of time so I should continue to have them in my life even though they were no longer serving me and in fact, were hindering my progress- there are many studies that say the more we invest in something, the longer we stay committed to them.

Many of you also do this.

I came to realize that once we dissect this habit, underlying belief systems become crystal clear. By agreeing to such, you are also implicitly agreeing to the following:

1. you do not trust that old will be replaced with new

2. you do not believe that new can be better than the old

3. you do not believe you deserve better

4. you are afraid of change

5. you believe all change is bad

Do you see how ridiculous this belief system is? To move forward and upward, we need to let go of things and people who feed us only negativity and toxicity. I grew up feeling that if I let go, I would be betraying my obligations. But truthfully we are not obligated to anything in our lives. Our relationships are a series of interactions that we agree to and it depends on where you want to go- if you want to move forward, connect with those who also carry this momentum. If people are dragging you down, they have their own shit to manage and by being there and pulling them at your own detriment, you are also robbing them of their lessons. If you continue to be a caretaker, you also need to examine your own insecurities and level of control you have in your own life. 

(Note: it is very difficult to see those who are close to you objectively. Here is a good exercise: there are people who attract one positive thing after another in their lives and those who seem to be stricken by an awful bout of bad luck. That's how you separate the positive from the negative- to be negative doesn't mean that someone is a bad person, it just means they have a lot of work to do to achieve balance/neutrality and/or switch into a mode of positivity/productivity)

If you let go of the old, that which stagnates, you create SPACE.

Do you know how important SPACE is? It is this very SPACE that allows MORE. Emptiness is not loneliness, is not a negative void. It is SPACE to be filled with BETTER.

Forgiveness is moving forward. It is accepting something for what it is, but it does not mean you need to be loyal to whatever circumstance or person you are forgiving. It means you are no longer accepting being dragged down energetically by negative feelings of resentment. Resentment will eat you alive from the inside.

Truth and Compassion carry the highest energetic vibrations. Get on this wavelength and you can be free.