"Sex Work"

Some of you might be surprised at this assertion: I find it difficult to understand why domination is considered sex work.

Sure it tackles sexuality, but sexuality is NOT sex. Sexuality is orientation based. Sex I see as a physical activity. I do nothing of the sort in my sessions and labelling domination "sex work" gives it an implication that is not accurate. 

As I've written about in my past posts, I have nothing against, nor any shame attached to any notions of sex work. I think if women find empowerment and liberation through any form of sex work, it is amazing. I understand and accept that my work is considered sex work because that's the box society puts it in. But I still find it baffling that this is the box it needs to be put in.

I can't speak for all dommes, but for me, my profession is performance art for a theater of one. My art tackles the mind. It deals with eroticism, not sex. The corporeal is of course part of eroticism but it pales in importance to the mind. Maybe my work is sexual in nature, but never is there any sex or anything that could be considered sex let alone any "normative" sexual activities like hand jobs, blowjobs, what have you. My work deals less with the physical body and much more with larger governing themes: control, connection & power. It interacts with the physical body as much as living day to day interacts with it. Why isn't bodywork sex work? How come when you're at the doctor getting a prostate exam it's not sex work? How come that very erotic immersive play is not considered sex work? How come context can easily shift something into a different box? If we're thinking in terms of semiotics consider this example: how come the SAME image of a nude woman in fashion is considered high end but when it is used in the context of "sex work" it carries a low end association?


Tributing a domme is never for a sexual service. It is for time and skill like any professional. It is also baffling how often (and I am SO fortunate as I've gotten to the point that these types of people rarely inquire) clients think that by paying for a sex worker's time they are fully entitled to take advantage of her? Would you have this notion with the other professionals in your life? Think about it. Why does context change EVERYTHING when it is the SAME human being in all contexts? Maybe that sex worker is also a lawyer. Why does it elicit a different association and therefore a different treatment?

Think about the root of your associations and eliminate the ones that don't make any goddamn sense. I promise you there are a lot of them that are occupying double the synapses in your brain. The brain is the only erogenous zone I'm interested in and I like ones that are efficient. Who wants 3 apps on their iPhone that do almost the same thing when you could consolidate and not waste the memory?